Doing the Right Thing

It’s so frustrating if you don't know whether you’re doing the right thing.  There’s that emotion that says that you feel one way and another is telling you feel different.  Well I feel that a lot because I chose to stand by my Trans Mom when my uncle started to be prejudiced against her.  It meant me giving up seeing my cousins and my Grandma. It was one of the hardest things I had to do. They all come periodically up to see my birth Mom and my sister. Of course they want to see me and that means that I have to choose whether I see them or not.  I never know what to do, I miss my cousins so much and yet I am afraid that by seeing them my Uncle will think that everything is fine even though it isn’t.  Why do people like him force me choose while he fails to talk about why he is excluding one of my family members, my Trans Mom. It makes me so angry and upset and to think that there are so many other people who are getting hurt by people like that. I just keep hoping that it well get better.

Something happened recently, my cousin came out as been gay, I am so pleased that she has had the courage  to do so. I was scared that my Uncle  would not except her but he did except her. That is brilliant for her but it got me to thinking WHY didn’t he except my Trans Mom ?

Hi to all the LGBT community out there, don’t listen to those who say you are different in a bad way or class you as ‘freaks’.  You are all beautiful in different ways and don’t forget:

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

living with a trans mom

My Mom is Trans, she started transitioning  six years ago.  It was bit  hard at first not calling  her Dad even  though i preferred  her as she is now.  As she began to transition it all began to make sense to me.  It had always been strange to me that my "Dad" felt more like my Mom than my actual Mom. As i grew up i begin to identify her as my second Mom, she was so caring and loving unlike my birth Mom.

After a year of her transitioning I had completely forgotten that I had ever had a “Dad”. It was so great having someone to go shopping with talk about girl things.  She’s my perfect Mom. My birth Mom was not happy about that.  She couldn’t accept me having two Moms.  I have to call my trans Mom Auntie.  Don't get me wrong, I love my birth Mom but there’s something about her and I have never been able to feel that close to her.  It was is so frustrating but I was basically  happy  with my life, I still am.

But  then  I had to deal with  the rest  of society around me, like at  my new school.  All my class mates wanted to know where my Dad was.  I didn't know what to say.  It had never occurred to me that anyone would ask me that.  I made up a cover story because partly I did not know how they would react if I said well actually my “Dad” is Trans plus I wanted to protect her because I knew that people could and would be really horrible to her.

I hate the way some people won’t accept people who are slightly different.  It seems inhuman to me, especially from the people the closest to you like my Uncle and his family.  He was so horrid and discriminatory to my Mom.  She wasn’t aloud in their house any more.  That was right at the beginning of her transitioning in 2006.  Since then I have refused to see my Uncle and his family  because i feel so strongly about it.  The thing that made me really angry was the way people like therapists would  try and figure out my problems.  As soon as i  told them about my family and my Trans Mom they immediately jumped to the conclusion that it was because I had lost my ”Dad” even if I told them differently. I wanted to explain that I never felt as if I had a proper Dad and I don’t care because I love my Trans Mom for who she is and i wouldn’t change that.  She is the perfect Mom for me.  I think she as taught me so much about life and I am glad I have been able to help her hopefully somehow become how she wanted to be.  I have been there through everything she has dealt with throughout her transition.  People have expressed the opinion that she should keep things from me because they think that it will upset me.  Okay, fine,  it does upset me seeing the things she has to go through but it has also made me want to speak out and be counted as someone who thinks that the way that the LGBT community is dealt with by society in general is wrong.  I feel that they should have a much better deal than they do.  i have had difficult times dealing with having a trans Mom.  However, contrary to what some people might say I believe that it was not me who had the difficulty but society that has a problem with children and their trans parents.

Oh and for the record,  anyone who is a trans Mom or Dad out there or any other parent  from the LGBT community  I want to tell that you are doing an amazing job. Stay strong, love is louder .thanks Mom you’re amazing.


I just offer this as my own insight into growing up as a child with a trans Mom

Having a Trans Mom

I think it is so horrible how trans and the whole gay lesbian bi  community are treated. There is not enough awareness and support and protection from prejudice and hate given to them which means  that so many wonderful people die every year  from suicide  or from some some one killing them. I feel strongly that  governments should be doing more for them than they are doing, I firmly believe that  they should have much more recognition especially trans Moms.
You are probably wondering  why a sixteen year old girl is saying these things. It’s because my Mom is trans.  I see what she has been through.  It upsets me greatly that she has not had all the help she has needed to transition. I realize  how difficult  it is for her to transition but it must be so much more difficult to raise a child on your own as well. If i was going to look up to anyone it would have to be my Mom, she is so brave and she has so much determination.  She never gives up. I admire her greatly for that

I started to think if my Mom found it difficult  then what about the other people like her in the   LGBT community,  how did they cope?  My conclusion  was that they felt the same as my Mom, some of the might even have it worse than her, which makes me think why isn't someone doing anything  to help them or their families.

I guess I am writing this to say, never give up, stay strong and to recognize that these people are truly amazing and brave. More people should recognize that they are remarkable people.  Just because they are slightly different does not mean that they don't have Rights  and feelings and are normal people, more people should see that.

i hope you enjoyed reading my blog !

first guitar

this is my beautiful guitar.  i got it for my birthday a few years a go.
this is the guitar that i Learned   to play on. i was so pleased when i go it .
i hope i will cray on luring and move on to upwards.

song writing teenager

i am finding it so difficult to do all my studies and exams wail tiring to be a singer song writer and macing my first c.d it used to be a lot easier to write songs when i was younger   and not in eleventh grade.  hopefully by the end of this semester when i have my summer vacation i will be able to song write all i like and play around with music.and have a summer music  camp at home with my mom. can't wait !

Whey i love music

i absalutly love music it a real pation of mine, it always as been from a young age. i was brought up with a varaiaty of difrent types of music from folk listening to peater paul and mary, bob dylen , the dubliners  to country Billy Ray Cyrus Dolly Parton Johny  Cash ,The Dixie Chickes and sheryl  crow  to classic R&B Stevie Wonder, Aretha Franklin, Micheal Jackson and Ray Charles. I will always rember as a kid having different music playing in the baground in the house and the songs won of my perents would sing and play on guitar. witch inspierd me to start playing my self. i have fond mesories of use all having sing songs on a evening and having lenthy confesation about music and the difrent instrument.

as i have groun up i have quickly found that my all time favrite has to me rock. there is such a wide  range of sup genres in rock. like punk, rock and roll,indie ,hard rock and scar.  i love people like David Bowie, Rolling Stones, the Runnaways Joan jett, Susie Quatro, gun and roses, Qeen, green day coldplay the script and there just a few that i like there a hole long list of people i could mention. as a musician i resbect all genres of music iven if i am not that found personally. all tho i am not a big fan of highly ato tuned ofer re  mixed trackes that almost sound like a robot is singing and it taken to seconds to right the lyrics.

i would not be me with out my music, i love listening to it creating it. i would love to wright and sing as my carear it always been my dream job . i love haw you can get lost in a pice of music it can transform you to a hole other place. sometime it will make you foget about serten things and some times it will make you rember everything.