living with a trans mom

My Mom is Trans, she started transitioning  six years ago.  It was bit  hard at first not calling  her Dad even  though i preferred  her as she is now.  As she began to transition it all began to make sense to me.  It had always been strange to me that my "Dad" felt more like my Mom than my actual Mom. As i grew up i begin to identify her as my second Mom, she was so caring and loving unlike my birth Mom.

After a year of her transitioning I had completely forgotten that I had ever had a “Dad”. It was so great having someone to go shopping with talk about girl things.  She’s my perfect Mom. My birth Mom was not happy about that.  She couldn’t accept me having two Moms.  I have to call my trans Mom Auntie.  Don't get me wrong, I love my birth Mom but there’s something about her and I have never been able to feel that close to her.  It was is so frustrating but I was basically  happy  with my life, I still am.

But  then  I had to deal with  the rest  of society around me, like at  my new school.  All my class mates wanted to know where my Dad was.  I didn't know what to say.  It had never occurred to me that anyone would ask me that.  I made up a cover story because partly I did not know how they would react if I said well actually my “Dad” is Trans plus I wanted to protect her because I knew that people could and would be really horrible to her.

I hate the way some people won’t accept people who are slightly different.  It seems inhuman to me, especially from the people the closest to you like my Uncle and his family.  He was so horrid and discriminatory to my Mom.  She wasn’t aloud in their house any more.  That was right at the beginning of her transitioning in 2006.  Since then I have refused to see my Uncle and his family  because i feel so strongly about it.  The thing that made me really angry was the way people like therapists would  try and figure out my problems.  As soon as i  told them about my family and my Trans Mom they immediately jumped to the conclusion that it was because I had lost my ”Dad” even if I told them differently. I wanted to explain that I never felt as if I had a proper Dad and I don’t care because I love my Trans Mom for who she is and i wouldn’t change that.  She is the perfect Mom for me.  I think she as taught me so much about life and I am glad I have been able to help her hopefully somehow become how she wanted to be.  I have been there through everything she has dealt with throughout her transition.  People have expressed the opinion that she should keep things from me because they think that it will upset me.  Okay, fine,  it does upset me seeing the things she has to go through but it has also made me want to speak out and be counted as someone who thinks that the way that the LGBT community is dealt with by society in general is wrong.  I feel that they should have a much better deal than they do.  i have had difficult times dealing with having a trans Mom.  However, contrary to what some people might say I believe that it was not me who had the difficulty but society that has a problem with children and their trans parents.

Oh and for the record,  anyone who is a trans Mom or Dad out there or any other parent  from the LGBT community  I want to tell that you are doing an amazing job. Stay strong, love is louder .thanks Mom you’re amazing.


I just offer this as my own insight into growing up as a child with a trans Mom

Having a Trans Mom

I think it is so horrible how trans and the whole gay lesbian bi  community are treated. There is not enough awareness and support and protection from prejudice and hate given to them which means  that so many wonderful people die every year  from suicide  or from some some one killing them. I feel strongly that  governments should be doing more for them than they are doing, I firmly believe that  they should have much more recognition especially trans Moms.
You are probably wondering  why a sixteen year old girl is saying these things. It’s because my Mom is trans.  I see what she has been through.  It upsets me greatly that she has not had all the help she has needed to transition. I realize  how difficult  it is for her to transition but it must be so much more difficult to raise a child on your own as well. If i was going to look up to anyone it would have to be my Mom, she is so brave and she has so much determination.  She never gives up. I admire her greatly for that

I started to think if my Mom found it difficult  then what about the other people like her in the   LGBT community,  how did they cope?  My conclusion  was that they felt the same as my Mom, some of the might even have it worse than her, which makes me think why isn't someone doing anything  to help them or their families.

I guess I am writing this to say, never give up, stay strong and to recognize that these people are truly amazing and brave. More people should recognize that they are remarkable people.  Just because they are slightly different does not mean that they don't have Rights  and feelings and are normal people, more people should see that.

i hope you enjoyed reading my blog !